The Tyne and Wear metro bridge has been painted blue. Or was it always blue and I did not notice? It is nice to be in Newcastle. I bet myself 50p that if I mentioned Sunderland on the stage someone would say a thing. I did and one man made a booing noise. Oh dear.

The Tyne theatre is a lovely theatre and there are loads of photos back stage showing you the history of it. I wanted an ice cream tub in the interval, but could not find the woman, then when I did I realised my money was in my other trousers in the dressing room and I was wearing my stage trousers.
Wearing stage trousers is advice I picked up from a proper actor who does stand up comedy. He said it is not good to have bulky looking pockets on the stage, or people will look at them and stop thinking about your jokes and think about what is in your pockets instead.I have taken this advice, but not his other advice about getting a watch that vibrates so you know how long you have been on the stage. I think it is better to know how long 20 or 30 minutes is in your head, which you can do by standing still until you think 20 minutes have past, then looking at your watch.

After Newcastle we have set off on our Scottish leg. It is a leg of four parts and tonight is Glenrothes. I do not know to to proper pronounce the name yet, but will wiat to find some who looks nice enough to ask. A man is shouting at his dog.