Sunday was the proper wedding. I prepared as much as I could, but it was still mental looking at about 80% of all the people I know and have kept in touch with, all in the same place at the same time. The new suit arrived, the vows were written and the whole day was just one big rollercoaster, even the multitudinous photo’s don’t do it justice.

So I wear a ring now. It feels a bit odd. I take it off when I’m Danny Pensive, he doesn’t mind. Betty wouldn’t have it.

Part one of my stag do in Newcastle went great, meeting up with mates I’d not seen in a long while, and all getting smashed. Having booked a hotel so I was no trouble to anyone, I still ended up crashing at mate Gavin’s house where I woke at 4am with a desire to be violently sick.  It occured to me only at that point that I had not stayed at Gavins new home before and so did not know the location of the bathroom. Fortunately I found it on my second attempt, so sorry to Andy/Gary or whoever I stumbled in on sleeping.
I made it to the welcoming toilet bowl in time and thought I’d managed a clean cut heave, but when the sun came up it became apparent I had not, and had made a thick bib of florescence down my shirt. Not being far away I returned to the hotel for a wash and breakfast, then went back to Gavin’s as if nothing had happened. Well done me.

I need a waist coast, and some replacement cravats. I’ve got the waistcoat, which is not the MacDonalds issue charity shop one I threatened to get, but a proper one. No joy on the cravats though, and they’re expensive. I dislike ‘fashion’ shopping intensely. Just poking my head into to a Moss Bros or a Boss shop I’m not even looking at the clothes, but instead the predatory slightly camp shiny faced salesmen that slink around the place being ‘helpful’. I don’t really want their help to work out the size of a shirt in a packet I cant really see. This is not for me. Finally got the waistcoat after asking a man in the shop where the fitting rooms were. He didn’t work there. I know this is a highly unoriginal comic misunderstanding, but it did actually happen.

It occurs to me only now that the shirt I have for my wedding has no collar. Result.

For my stag night I’m having a night out in Newcastle, followed by a day on a Canal boat in Cheshire. On the second date I will wear my yacht cap, also imported from America, and it will look appropriate.

I am having a cake made, as it my future wife, but this is a secret.

2011 disappeared in a flurry of Xmas and Skyrim addiction, and now suddenly it’s 2012 and I get married in three months which s all a bit imminent. As well as that and some sorely overdue booking, I’m doing Jesting About in the North East, where I’m contributing sketches to a half hour radio show that will be recorded live in Newcaslte in February, more info here.

It’s a great kick up the backside for me to write more.  There were some great sketches by the team, I’ve not written sketch format for a long time and it’s evident at the first read through, where my stuff got the laughs, but was a bit lacking in internal logic.

 Gag Reels at the Frog and Bucket - Tuesday 25th October

The Frog & Bucket comedy club are showing another of their ‘Gag Reels’ night where a comedian gives a running commentary over one of their favorite films. I’ve been invited to do this one, and I’ll be doing a big colourful movie from 1965 which has Peter Cushing and Bernard Cribbins in it and lots of angry sink plunger wielding mutants and a plan to invade the earth.

Expect lots and lots of affectionate digs, possibly a drinking game involving Sugar Puffs product placement, and also possibly a full re-enactment of the robomen-eating-dinner where everyone gets a paper plate with peas rolling round on it.

http://www.frogandbucket.com/manchester-shows/

DANNY PENSIVE’S MAP OF BRITAIN – WEDNESDAY 26th

I’ll doing my Edinburgh 2011 show at the manchester comedy festival on the 26th October at the Lass O’Gowrie pub. Show starts at 9.15pm and is £3. More info over  on Danny’s proper website

LET’S SEE WHAT HAPPENS – SATURDAY 29th

I’m joining the Comedysportz improv gang to do their longform show, at the lass O’Gowrie

DOCTOR WHO TRIBUTE IMPROV – SUNDAY 30th

What is says, an improvised episode, or maybe two, at the lass O’Gowrie

Day 21 – Poole
Down to the South coast and Poole. I’m knackered and rock up into the dressing room of the lighthouse for a kip. In fact I kip for most of the day and don’t really see anything or anyone until showtime. If I see another sandwich I will shoot someone in the face with it. I don’t even remember the show.
On the way out of Poole we stop at a Tesco’s 24. Look at this shelf of cider. This is Tesco’s. It may look like an average selection of cider like any other Tescos’s, but it isn’t. You’d be surprised just how much the menu changes when you get near Somerset and it’s neighbouring counties. Thatchers gold in both bottles and cans, Sheppy’s Dabinet and three varieties of Cornish rattler, you’d be hard pushed to find those in the North West and North East in your average supermarket…and they’re all gorgeous.

Day 22 – Taunton
Into somerset proper where I get a large flaggon of Sheppy’s scrumpy that will hopefully make it all the way home to Manchester at the end of tour. In the car we listen to soundtracks from computer games, and I rabbit on about the Elder Scrolls RPG games until everyone is utterly bored, but at least I’m not banging on about Doctor Who anymore. Anything to stay awake at the wheel. I am amused by a shop called ‘world of bears’ but I don’t know why.
The show is good for me and great for Charlie, plenty of laughs. I find it hard work, but wouldn’t change it for the world. Five show’s left.

Day 23 – Eastbourne
Eastbourne is lovely. It’s Saturday (must hang on to what day it is) and the sun is shining, the sky is full of those guys on motorised parachute thingy’s whirling about all over the shop which looks really exciting. I wander through the main shopping parade where like Manchester they have a shopping centre called the arndale, and down to the sea.

Click here to view the video on YouTube.

The Devonshire Park Theatre is old and lovely and we have a top show, really enjoyable. The landlord of the venue pub next door gets us to sign the poster for the show and will put it with the others on his wall. It’s a thrill as I have so much affection all the British actors I see the names of on the walls. Awesome.
Our hotel is a small chain owned by John Malcovich the actor. It’s our intention to look for the seventh and a half floor and climb inside his head, but unfortunetly as we arrive the lift has been broken by a dozen topless drunk stags who have all tried to squeeze into it. They all come out laughing like idiots as they inconvenience all the other guests in the hotel. We carry our bags up three flights of stairs. I want to push them all into the sea. There is a picture of John Malcovich on the wall of the room, looking p***ed off. I think he knows.

Day 24 – Southsea
It’s quiet, not much is open and getting dinner is a chore as we go into the pub next to the Kings Theatre. Seeing someone eating a Sunday lunch I try to work out how they knew to order it being that there are no menus on the tables, and no specials board. On asking for a menu we get a single piece of A4 paper, with no mention of Sunday lunch on it. I go to the bar and ask if they do Sunday lunch. There’s is a noticeable pause before the girl replies ‘We do a Sunday roast?’ Bless. She brings a friend of over to help with the sentence ‘We’ve got Chicken, Beef or Pork, but no Chicken’. Charlie notices seating upstairs and tests them further. ‘Yes you can sit upstairs, but there’s no table service upstairs’ came the seemingly adequate reply until we realise the kitchen is upstairs and the serving waitresses have to go upstairs in order to fetch the food down.
We have time to kill as Erin goes in to prep the show, so me and Charlie visit the D-Day museum. I don’t know that I expected much, but it was a great display of vehicles and memorabilia, showing the preparation for operation Overlord and the sheer scale of the operation it’s hard to imagine. Impressive and really sobering.
The theatre is gorgeous, another ageing beauty. The show is great too, and after we to the Phoenix for a pint where I get uncharacteristically shirty, then calm down (I’m just tired). The walls are awesomely covered with signed photo’s and I get snap happy on pictures of Bernard Horsfall, David Yip, Sue Pollard, Tom O’Conner, Bernard Breslaw, Spike Milligan and the pub dog.

Day 25, 26 – Break & Alnwick
On the road for most of the day, from South coast to Northumberland six hours or so seeing nearly all of the A1/M1, deciding against the M18 connecting road just to be a purist. A nice meal where I eat some beetroot and cucumber, a chat to the wife, a pint and bed.
If you like books, Alnwick has an amazing second hand bookshop called Barter Books – it’s just huge. I’m not a big reader and I spent the best part of an hour in it instead of visiting the castle which is also huge. The town itself is quite small but the people are canny and you can feel the history here.